Defenseload

My first Russian meal

- 2 Tiny slices of tomato
- 1 invicible slice of cucumber
- 10 grams of going up you nose real fast hot-hot mustard
- 1 small chicken breast chunk
- 5 black beans
- A 20 grams jar of some kind of a pink salty as hell fish eggs

The rest I didnt want to touch, since it was all processed.
The man in front of me with the huge forearms just dug in with a spoon and ate a small package of Margarine while humming in delight...

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Music Video First Aid Kit Cedar Lane

First Aid Kits "Emmylou" was my favorite track of 2012. Seemingly out of nowhere the Swedish duo managed (in that way that many musicians from other countries do) to consolidate the 1970s Gram Parsons/Emmylou Harris country into something refreshing and new while paying homage to the original. June 10, First Aid Kit drops Stay Gold, which I hope has more than one The Outsiders, reference in it, Pony Boy. And, today, the group let us see "Cedar Lane" a bewitching track from the album with a lilting chorus and psychedelic video. Enjoy below and pre order Stay Gold  here.

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My first comics!

I have a lot on my mind, in case you havent noticed. Ive also been brainwashed by 2 Guys Buying Comics (even though there are three of them) into linking to them a lot. Like Chriss post from last week, in which he gets far too verbose about Batmans duds. He challenges anyone reading the post to write about their first comic, which was something I had been thinking about anyway, so I am going to take him up on his challenge! Wont this be groovy?

I have mentioned before that I didnt buy my first true-blue comic book until I was 17. I may have purchased some Archie digests prior to that - my sister was big into Archie, and I enjoyed them to a certain extent, so we probably bought them in the early 1980s. However, it wasnt until September 1988 that I bought my first floppy pamphlet - and a gold star goes to whoever remembers what it is!

Okay, only hardcore and possibly stalker readers ought to remember that it was Batman #426 - the opening chapter of the event that changed Batmans life forever: the death of Jason Todd!!!! The story of my purchase goes something like this:

My best friend Ken (who reads this blog occasionally - hi Ken!) and I were strolling through Willow Grove Park Mall one fine autumn afternoon in 1988 (it may have been Montgomery Mall, but Im almost positive it was Willow Grove). We stopped outside a Walden Bookstore and were looking at the spinner racks of comics. Ken had been a comic collector for years (something he had picked up from his brother - ah, the chain of pushing becomes clear!) and he was just flipping through some of the titles that were on the rack. I gravitated toward Batman #426. Im not sure why - the art didnt really do it for me, because I didnt realize that Mignola is freakin excellent, and its not like its all that bold and dynamic a cover design even if I had realized that Mignola is freakin excellent. I didnt have a lot of exposure to Batman, but I always liked him. Maybe it was just the character and the synergy of looking at a comic book while my evil Faustian friend happened to be there to tell me all about it.

Now, I wasnt the kind of person whose only experience with Batman was the television show or even that show and the Superfriends. I knew all about his "dark" roots in the 1930s and early 40s, and thanks to my local library, I had read his origin and the first Joker story in the early 1980s. My library didnt have comic books, but it did have a section devoted to graphic art, and in that section was a hardcover book with all the origins of the Golden Age DC heroes - so I knew all about Green Lantern and Flash and Batman and Superman and Wonder Woman, even though I didnt collect comics. Libraries are cool. Patronize one today!

So when I flipped through Batman #426, I wasnt shocked to see how "dark" it was. Sure, I remembered the TV show with fondness (who doesnt?) but it didnt bother me that this comic was significantly different in tone than it was. I was wondering whether I should buy it, but then Ken uttered those magic words about them killing Robin. I was totally hooked. I bought those four issues, did not vote either for or against killing Jason, and they became my gateway drug into the glorious world of comic books.

Im not sure why, though. I mean, theyre not that good, are they? Starlins story is kind of crappy, and the hook of having the bloodthirsty fans kill off Jason didnt really sit well with me. I know Aparo is God among some, but hes never been my favorite, so the art didnt blow me away. It was perfectly adequate (which is how I describe all of Aparos art, frankly - it gets the job done), but nothing that made me shiver. I really cant say what it was that hooked me. Maybe the fact that the Ayatollah Khomeini was in it - what a weird decision on Starlins part! Maybe the fact that the Joker was just so evil. Maybe because Batman cant touch his nemesis because of his diplomatic immunity. Looking back on it, its just not that good a story, but for some reason, I was hooked.

I quickly moved on to other titles. First, Ken introduced me to the real star of the Batman universe at that time: Detective Comics. Alan Grant, John Wagner, and Norm Breyfogle were right at that moment in the middle of a mind-blowing run on the title, and Ken let me read a few (Im not sure why he bought them, because hes not a big fan of Breyfogles art - yes, he is a Commie - but it might have had something to do with the fact that comics were 75 cents and you could afford to buy things you didnt absolutely love - I know he liked the stories, so maybe he liked the art enough to continue with it). Im not sure which one was the first I saw, but it was either issue #590, 591, or 592. Three better covers youd be hard-pressed to find, and the stories (well, not the first one, which is a simplistic morality tale about evil Muslims and the evil American government) are unbelievably good. That last one features the first appearance of Cornelius Stirk, and Im pretty sure it was the first issue of Detective I bought. What a freakin masterpiece. It was my first exposure to what comics with a good story and great art could do, and how the medium could be used to tell gripping tales. Breyfogles fluid style and wonderful depiction of Batman has stayed with me, and for some unknown reason, when most people talk about the greatest Batman artists, they omit Breyfogle. Its a damned shame.

Obviously, my addiction had flared into full-fledged obsession, and it wasnt long before I began to branch out into other titles. For a long while I stayed with the classics - Batman and, from Marvel, Spider-Man. Soon after I started buying both Batman titles, I saw the cover of Amazing Spider-Man #312 and fell in love with everyones favorite whipping boy, Todd McFarlane.

I must beg your forgiveness for that. You see, I didnt realize McFarlane sucked and was responsible for all the evil in the history of comic books. I just thought his Spider-Man looked cool - very arachnid-like and almost creepy, and his Mary Jane was hot! Okay, she had too much hair, but I remembered Mary Jane from the early-1970s cartoon, and she was a plain Jane. I also remember her from the newspaper strips and reprints of ASM I had glanced at over the years, and no one ever made her look like McFarlane. Yowza! I had no idea what was going on in the comic, having no idea who the Hobgoblin was and why he was fighting the Green Goblin, but Michelinies story was intriguing enough, and soon I was collecting Amazing Spider-Man, something I stuck with for well over 100 issues, even after they really started to suck. I also found and bought all the issues back to #238, the first appearance of the Hobgoblin. Issues #238-289 form one of the epic stories in comic book history, even though later writers dropped the ball with the Hobgoblin.

It wasnt long before I became entangled in Marvels mutant books. I suppose anyone who has ever bought comics gets entangled in Marvels mutant mess at one point or another. Ken let me read the Dark Phoenix saga and most of the issues since, but for a while I felt no need to go out and start buying them myself. In the summer of 1989 we got Uncanny X-Men #251, with that iconic cover of Wolverine nailed to the cross. I love that cover, and bought the issue. This time I knew what was going on, having read the previous issues even though I didnt own them, and that issue, with Logans fever dream and his epiphany concerning the fate of the X-Men and Pierce nailing him to the cross and Jubilee eventually rescuing him made me an X-Men fanatic. Many people (Our Lord and Master included) have indicated their scorn of the post-Paul Smith X-Men (from #176 on), but despite a slight drop in quality, the hundred issues post-Smith are very good and very interesting reading. These issues in the 250s are really good, too - Wolverine trying to escape the Outback and the Reavers slaughtering the mutants on Muir Island, and of course, the Jim Lee Psylocke issues. Of course I was hooked, and Psylocke and Dazzler (who starred in issue #260) quickly became my favorite X-Men.

Its interesting looking back on the patterns I established with my purchases back in late 1988 and through 1989. Comics were cheaper, so I was much more able to be a "completist" - Im glad I was with the X-Men, but I rarely re-read the Amazing Spider-Mans I own after sometime in the #330s, because their quality is just not that good. I also didnt necessarily need to buy Batman and Detective all the time, but I did. I dug through the back issue boxes of the local comic stores - there was one across the street from Willow Grove and one near the mall in Montgomeryville - to find the answers to questions I had about the characters - there was no recourse to the Internet, obviously, and I dont even think Wizard existed. Ken was my resource - he let me read some of his back issues, and if I liked them, I went and found them myself. He also let me read a lot of comics that I dont own, some - the Gruenwald Captain Americas - that I wish I did, and some - the Jim Lee Punishers - that I dont really care that I dont. But I gradually branched out into more underground stuff, and gradually discovered that comics could do a lot more than tell superhero stories. I always have a soft spot in my heart, though, for Batman and Spider-Man. They were the first.

This is the reason why I dont worship Kirby and Ditko as much as some people. By the time I got into comics their day had passed, and I never went back and got all the back issues that they created. This is why I dont have fond memories of the Crisis on Infinite Earths - I certainly own it, but it didnt have any world-altering effect on me because I wasnt reading comics at the time. I dont care about 1970s comics as much as others because, although I was prime comic-book reading impressionable age in the 70s (I was born in 1971), I simply didnt buy them. Therefore, a lot of my knowledge about pre-1988 comics comes second-hand, through the eyes and mind of a teenager or adult. Its strange reading about some in the comics blogaxy waxing poetic about Ditkos Shade, the Changing Man or Gerbers Howard the Duck, because Ive never read them and I have no childhood nostalgia factor working for me with regard to them. Im trapped in a late 1980s universe, which also means by the time Image rolled around, I was a little more able to resist its charms. Comics certainly werent perfect in the late 1980s, but it was still a good time to get into them.

I hope others let us all know about their first comics, either in the comments or on their own blogs. Its kind of cool to read about the first experiences of people who are now hopelessly addicted. Cant we all share?

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My first DEAL!!!

A few weeks ago I decided to once again attempt to wrap my brain around the concept of real couponing...this came after a failed attempt about a year ago. I attended a couponing class that another homeschool mom was teaching and was finally inspired to start off...really slowly.

So, I began by simply saving my coupon inserts from the Sunday papers...not clipping them...just saving the entire inserts in file with the date marked clearly on the front of each insert.

Thats all I did...for five weeks.

Finally, I heard of another mom who was teaching a coupon class and decided to go to it and see what she had to say. She basically said the same thing as the first mom. However, after seeing all the great deals she was getting, I decided I couldnt wait any longer. I got my coupons out...I got the ads out...I visited the necessary couponing websites and this is what I got...

•Red Baron pizza on sale $2.78
- $1 cpn (10/24 SS)

2 pizzas/2 coupons $1.78 each $3.56 TOTAL


•Colgate toothpaste on sale $1
- $1 cpn (10/31 SS)

3 toothpastes/3 coupons $0 Total


•Ricola drops on sale $.50
- $1/2 cpn (10/17 SS)

6 ricolas/3 coupons $0 TOTAL


•Campbells Cream soup on sale $.49
- $1/4 cpn printable

8 cream of mushroom/2 coupon $.24 each $1.92 TOTAL


•Campbells Chunky or Select Harvest soup on sale $.99
- $.50/1 cpn printable

2 Chunky soups/2 coupons $.49 each $.98 TOTAL


Stove Top Stuffing on sale $.75
-$1/2 cpn printable

2 Stuffings/1 coupon $.25 each $.50 TOTAL

23 Items
Total worth (before sale): $48.32
Sale savings: -$27.83
Coupon savings: -$14

TOTAL PAID: $6.49

This was so exciting...and its not even that great of a deal compared to what the coupon queens are doing.

In case you are wondering, I went to Kroger for this shopping trip.

And because I know some of you are going to ask...heres the gist of it...

-In order to drastically reduce your grocery bill (think $30-50 a week) you have to stockpile and it takes time.

-You only buy items when they are on deep sale AND you have a coupon for it making it free or very cheap. Then you buy as many items as you have coupons so that you can stockpile that item until it goes on deep sale again.

-In order to do this you have to buy multiple newspapers each week. Most coupon queens buy 6-10. I started out only buying 3, but will be buying more this week.

-Once you have a good stockpile, you start planning your weekly menus based around what you have in stock. Then you can spend $20-30 on just the deals that week and $20-30 on fresh produce for the week.

-Finally, each week you will have to spend a little bit of time planning which deals you are going to partake in. To do that go to one of the following blogs and view the "match-ups" for the week at your favorite stores.

www.kingdomklipper.blogspot.com
www.mamacheaps.com
www.frugalcouponliving.com

A "match-up" is a listing of a great sale item along with where to find a matching coupon (either with a link to a printable coupon or it will tell you the date that the coupon was in the Sunday paper...this is why you dont clip your coupons each Sunday.)

Thats pretty much it in a nutshell, but the above websites go much more in depth on how to master couponing. I just wanted to share my first great deal because....well, wouldnt you??!!

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N O V E L T Y Jef Montes Ritualistic First Show Illuminosa

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My First App

I have a dilemma regarding ebook publishing. I am a seasoned graphic designer/illustrator trying to break into the kidlit industry with an author/illustrator picture book.


Id just begun sending out dummies of my book to potential agents when I was contacted by a publishing company specializing exclusively in ebook apps for the iPad. They had seen my work at a regional SCBWI event and wanted me to submit any manuscripts/dummies I happened to have for their review and possible acceptance. They went on, in that initial conversation, to say that if the app sold large numbers, it would make it potentially appealing to traditional publishers. 

Thats probably true.  But what are the chances of it selling in large numbers?  Thats the question.

Im a total noob at this (a key reason I was seeking an agent!) and dont want to miss the chance of my book being something really wonderful. Although Im not afraid to embrace new technologies, I believe traditional publishing is better for many reasons. I know a good editor is worth her weight in gold and can do to a good MS what a good Art Director can do with a bunch of disparate pieces of art and copy.


Heres the question. If I submit to this app publisher, and they accept and publish my PB, will that completely shoot down any chances of it getting published as a traditional, printed book? Should I just stick it out and see what turns up with my submissions to agents?

If you think that your book is going to change significantly in the editing and design process, then you probably dont want to publish it as an app first.  

If you do decide to publish your book as an app, dont hand over your creative property to someone unless they can show you an app theyve done before that you think is cool.  Lots and lots of people are trying to make apps.  Some of them suck at it.  Be warned.

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My First Linky Party

Well, Im posting my first linky party for a friend of mine. Tammy over at Live, Love, Laugh is linking up, and the topic is New Years Resolutions. Tammy is amazing, so check her blog out at the link below.

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My first blogger postcard is here!

I received my first Blogger Postcard! I am so thrilled!!

Thanks, Payal, for the sweet note on the card. And thanks, Meeta, for coming up with this brilliant idea. (Btw, if you want to see what lovely Payal looks like, click here. ;-) )

Now Im waiting for my postcard to reach the recipient. Its gonna take time, I know. It has a long way to travel after all. All the way to A.... oops, I am not supposed to tell yet. ;-)

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My First Groovy DSL

Its no secret Im a groovy homer. I love it. One of the things that makes using groovy so fun, is its syntax. Being able to get the contents of a file by just saying new File("/home/james/test.log").text is refreshing compared to its java counterpart. Another thing that makes groovy enjoyable is its ability to support Domain Specific Languages (DSL). MarkupBuilder is a great example. With Groovy, you can create simple or very complex DSLs for your purposes. To my knowledge there are a few ways you can create your own DSL: extending BuilderSupport or using methodMissing/propertyMissing. In my opinion, extending BuilderSupport is more involved while methodMissing/propertyMissing is kind of the poor mans way of creating a DSL.

Up to this point though, Ive never actually came across a good use case for creating a DSL until this past week. We have a large set of automated tests that run against our REST Services. Since our application is now multi-tenant, all of our tests need a valid organization (tenant). In our case, an organization contains multiple roles and locations. Each test has different requirements on the types of organizations it needs. Some might need 2 unique organizations, while another might need an organization with at least 2 roles and 2 locations. It was this use case that I thought a groovy DSL would fit perfectly.

My end goal was to have something like this:

def orgs = OrganizationService.getOrganizations().withRoles().withLocations()

This would return a list of organizations that had at least 1 role and 1 location. The nice thing about this DSL is its scalable. Meaning, if we add new lists of information to an organization, we wont have to update our class. Also, an important feature, is the method name Roles and Locations correlate to the JSON named arrays of the organization. So my JSON looks something like this:

{"organizations": {"name": "James", "roles": ["R1", "R2"], "locations": ["Tulsa", "Omaha"]}}

When writing my DSL I decided to go the poor mans way and use the methodMissing approach combined with the @Delegate annotation. Here it is:

import net.sf.json.JSONArray

class OrganizationFilterArray {
 @Delegate private JSONArray array
 
 OrganizationFilterArray(array) {
 this.array = array
 }
 
 def methodMissing(String name, args) { 
 if (name.startsWith("with")) {
 def length = (args.length == 0) ? 1 : args[0]
 def arrayName = name[4..5].toLowerCase() + name[6..-1]
 
 return filterByLength(arrayName, length)
 } else {
 throw new MissingMethodException(name, this.class, args)
 }
 }
 
 private filterByLength(listName, length) { 
 def filteredArray = array.findAll {
 it."$listName"?.size() >= length
 }
 
 return new OrganizationFilterArray(filteredArray)
 }
}

I could have just as easily extended JSONArray since its not final, but I was following the @Delegate guide initially and just thought it was an interesting alternative. The big key here is how I used methodMissing to support an infinite amount of possibilities with how to filter an organization. Everything else I think is pretty self explanatory. When it comes across a method that is missing, withRoles(), it calls my methodMissing method. From there I filter out all the organizations that dont fit the criteria. Eventually, this class could be refactored to support more than just the size of an array. Note, I did have to upgrade the gmaven plugin version to 1.0 to get it work in our maven project.

I knew from the beginning I wasnt going to use BuilderSupport. It did take me some time to figure out how I was going to support filtered (getOrganizations().withRoles()) and non-filtered versions (getOrganizations()). That is when I decided to extend List or JSONArray, as both method calls had to return my custom List/JSONArray. Overall, Im pretty happy with the outcome and how long it took me. It was pretty trivial and very fun thanks to groovy.

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